Falling Behind…

The last few weeks have been so rich in detail, splendor, challenge and connection but I struggle to find the time to keep track of it all. With five kids, one who is two and another seventeen, recently home from Ethiopia, and three boys in between I sometimes wonder where to place my focus. Often at the end of the day I question if I have given them all that they needed. Many days I fail miserably and feel like I am falling behind in every category of knowing and molding their hearts. I fall behind some days before I can even get started. With friends, extended family and commitments I feel like I am chasing my tail, trying to stay afloat and in the mix without looking and feeling too crazy. It must be hysterical to watch.

The other day we all ventured to Target to prepare three boys for back to school. Ava screamed and Owen climbed around the cart, Tadesse stayed very close, as he generally does, and the other two boys walked ahead, perhaps wondering if they should claim us as their own. Later that night I looked at Bob and remarked, “We really are THAT family.” He busted out laughing. You know… the family that you stare at and wonder what their story is and how they keep their sanity. Yes that would be us and in the moment sometimes I would like to pull my hair out until I can step away and find a quiet moment of reflection. Then I almost always begin to grin,  thankful for the crazy, beautiful, wonderful and chaotic life. Meeting everyone’s needs and keeping all the behaviors in check is tough stuff but I would never want to miss all of this…

Often we cannot handle it all but God can. Seek Him and trust Him when it feels like your sinking and not able. Seek Him when words hurt or time breaks. Seek Him when you need to trust your choices and decisions. Seek Him when you are consoling your child and planning for his or her future. Seek Him in the quiet moments but also in the crazy confusing moments of noise and distraction. Seek him with gratitude for all the many experiences this life brings…

I need to be batter with so very many things yet I do feel like I am doing the best I can. What I crave most is God’s sufficient grace and a clear picture of just how much fun all the experience and activity of having a big family has brought us this summer. We have truly had a blast and what a gift it has been to have Tadesse join us in life before the school year begins. Thank you Lord for the gift of my amazing children. I just keep reminding myself even in the hard moments and days that you Lord will equip me and that you alone are enough. Amen!

Here is a peak into the last few weeks of summer adventure…

This boy rocked his first 5k! Of course he loved the mud.

I ran with these two dirt balls and had a blast! Lost my shoes in the very first patch of thick quicksand like mud. There were abandoned shoes by the hundreds but I dug mine out in order to carry on. Thanks Owen for your encouragement!

Winner in his heat and muddy enough to prove it!

Can you even believe how filthy? It was great fun.


Here we are in the large showering station. We finally resorted to throwing all our clothes and shoes into a grabage bag and wrapping in towels to travel home. Obviously, the washing machine had a massive afternoon workout!


Here’s our brown eyed beauty enjoying frozen yogurt with all her favorite boys…
We are so blessed she has been home for two years!

Just look at these crazies I hang with every day. They make me smile, cringe, laugh and even yell (yep five kids will do that to you) many times a day. I am grateful for all the tenderness and challenge they bring to our lives.


…and then he was a seventh grader. huh?

My beautiful, insane and precious crew. Thank you God.

Here’s to the final days of summer. May they be rich in memories and fun. What a season this has been. It has not been easy and sometimes I deeply miss time with friends, family and my husband but these five smiling faces are worth everything and I am blessed to call them mine.

Peace and Grace,





1 reply
  1. Karla
    Karla says:

    All smiles looking at all 5 of your blessings! No way……kids don’t make you yell. They make you sing songs like Mary Poppins and dance on the roof…right….right….Bwahahahahahaha!

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